international student life

international student

How to meet new people and make new friends in College.

Tips on how to meet new people in college and gain many friendships in a new college. How to make people be interested in you and have them invite you to their activities.

Many students right out of high school worry about meeting new people and making new friends when they go to college. There are many ways a new college student can easily make friends with the people he/she meets in college.

In general, when you meet people for the first time, look friendly, give off that friendly vibe and say something to the effect of "Hello" or "hi" or a smile and quick nod with a "hey!," you'll come across as less of a random threat/weirdo and people will be more open to chatting with you.

Then during your conversations with people, ask them questions about themselves, ask questions about the answers they give you. People generally like to talk about themselves. They'll feel more comfortable around you which will make you more comfortable around them. However don't overdo it and make it seem like an interview as this may seem weird. Also remember that friendship is a two way game and you can only control your side. You can't force friendship, not everyone is going to click, so don't worry if your efforts don't lead to a friendship.

One trick to the game is to ask open questions. Avoid questions that have yes / no answers. Try checking if your question is more open e.g. Do you like pancakes? becomes a much more interesting conversation starter when you ask, How do you like pancakes? with more potential to add follow up questions.

Also its good to avail yourself to doing things with other people. If you make excuses and reasons not to do stuff with other people, they will just assume they can't or won't do anything with them next time, and before you know it, you're an acquaintance and no longer a friend.

You can also join recreation and sport leagues where there is no pressure to have an at length conversation with anyone. Just play. And if your team wins, ask people to get drinks after to celebrate. This way you will be able to get more opportunities to get more friends.

Another way to gain friends is to Invite people to things with you. Shared experiences are what really turn acquaintances into friends, and instead of waiting around for people to suddenly start including you in their plans, start including them in yours. Next time they're planning something, they might think to invite you, and onward and upward the friendship may build from there.

When having a conversation with people, ask them about their interests. This will get them talking about themselves. Most people love talking about themselves especially when they are successful or doing something they love. Examples of questions you can ask include: "what do you do in your free time?" or "what's your favorite thing to do in the whole world?!" Keep asking follow up questions and give 100% of your focus on every sentence.

You must show interest and find a way to genuinely appreciate whatever it is they do for a living or whatever it is they are talking about. Showing interest is very important, but don't overdo it. Keep your enthusiasm level relatively low, but your curiosity high. You aren't trying to come across as someone you're not, this isn't about being fake. This about you delivering the best, extroverted version of yourself.

Ask as many questions as you can until you find something of a common interest. This is where you put the brakes on the questioning. This is very important as you don't want the first encounter to continue sounding like a one-way interview. Show that you were listening and when that common interest arises start sharing your thoughts and opinions! Add value to the conversation and they will start to see a connection too.


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